WWE Monday Night Raw 2/11/2008

Monday Night Raw opened with the Hornswoggle vs. Mr. McMahon match. You know, almost every time that Vince walks the ramp (especially so if he is in wrestling gear), I have to chuckle. See, I can't help but remember the Vince McMahon of my childhood, the 1980's, skinny announcer, pre-powerwalking Vince. It's really quite remarkable how big he is now, when compared to the younger Vince McMahon.

Anyhow, enough reminiscing... Hornswoggle vs. Vince:

I can't say that I was looking forward to this match since they announced it last week. To be honest, I don't really like where the whole story line has gone, and is going (Seriously, a steel cage match next week? C'mon). Regardless, there were some things to talk about:
* An Elbow & Collar tie-up between a 6'2" man and a 'little person'. Um, what's the point?
* Speaking of points, Vince McMahon's incredibly pointy elbows. I'd swear he had 'pointy elbow implants', if there were such a thing
* A 'Test of Strength' between a 6'2" man and a 'little person'. Again, what's the point? Heh.
* Finlay clubbing Vince McMahon with a shillelagh. My gut reaction was, 'Holy s***! He really hit him!'. We would see later in a promo with William Regal that Vince, indeed, was clubbed. He had a huge golf ball-sized bump on the back of his head. It looked like the lump that appears when an anvil is dropped on Wile E. Coyote. Ouch.

Y2J vs. JBL. A fairly good-paced match. I was surprised to see Chris Jericho using some dirty tactics (forehead biting, face raking, etc), but I suppose this is a part of the 'new Jericho'. Jericho also did a nice step-up enzuigiri, reminiscent of a shining wizard. The match ended with Jericho's new finisher, the codebreaker, and Y2J getting the pin. I was actually fairly bummed that this is his new finisher, an obvious rip off of Carlito's backstabber. Umaga ran in after the match and gave samoan spikes to both Y2J and JBL. I can't say that this surprised me... I've never seen the Umaga character as having loyalty to anyone. he's a stand-alone character.

Tonight, we also saw an anti-steriod WWE PSA featuring John Cena. Viewing Audience, we've been put on notice... In addition to the locker room, the entire viewing audience is now governed by WWE's Wellness Program. So don't use drugs, use steroids or growth hormones... and watch what allergy medications you take or we'll all be suspended. There are no shortcuts to your goals.

Next up, the re-introduction of Paul Burchill (& his 'sister'), vs. Brian Kendrick. It irritated me that JR acted as if we'd never seen Paul Burchill before. ('...very talented, or so we have been told'). It's hard to forget the pirate gimmick, JR. No, he wasn't on Raw before, but still.
...oh by the way, the WKC Dog Show is now being shown on CNBC. Dogs Rule! (if you watched Raw, you know what I am talking about)... now back to the rant...
Paul Burchill does have a pretty cool finisher... it's his old finisher from OVW, the Curb Stomp (deathlock surfboard followed by a head stomp into the canvas). He followed this with a rolling cutter.
A couple of side notes:
* Stop the subliminal incestuous chemistry gimmick between the Burchills now. It's freakin' creepy.
* It's really a shame that Kendrick is being wasted as a jobber. The guy has a lot of talent. Seriously, he's becoming the Raw version of ECW's Colin Delaney.

We saw Cena vs. Mark Henry with RKO at the announce table last night. Not much to note except it was a relatively short match. I'm sure 'the message' was supposed to be, 'Cena can beat Henry in about three minutes', but the message I received (and I'm sure many other marks received) was, 'we're continuing to rest Cena'.
Side note:
* None of us believe that the Randy Orton character is afraid of Cena to the point that he won't make eye contact or stand up. Ridiculous.

Kennedy & Ric Flair in-ring promo. Great promo. Awesome promo. These two characters were made to rant at each other. I have to say, I'm pretty damn excited about the possibilities here. Not that I am necessarily excited about the match itself, but the possibilities afterward (Sorry, I'm not a Ric Flair fan. I haven't been in many years. Frankly, he's boring). Regardless of who wins, picture Flair taking Kennedy under his wing and mentoring him. I agreed with what HBK said at the Royal Rumble about the similarities between the two characters (loud mouth with platinum blond hair with catch phrase, that gimmick will never work), but agree even more so after last night's promo. Honestly, I am hoping that what HBK said was foreshadowing. I wouldn't consider it a predictions, but I would like to see Kennedy retire Flair, they shake hands, Flair retires from wrestling and becomes Kennedy's valet.
Side note:
* Kennedy's Flair strut is hilarious

There was Divas match between Maria & Melina last night. It wasn't as bad as usual Diva matches we've been seeing. Not much overselling or missed spots. Melina has certainly improved and executed a pretty cool octopus stretch that I'd not seen her use before. The screeching and squealing still irritates the Hell out of me, and there was more than usual last night. Whoever in creative told the Divas, 'okay, I'd like you to give us more squealing' is a moron.
Side note:
* We still don't care about Divas being in Playboy.
* Someone please teach Maria how to throw a clothesline (Bradshaw, I'm looking at you)

The Main Event was Shawn Michaels vs. Jeff Hardy. As one would expect, a match with good pace and good action. For once I didn't get irritated with HBK's tired signature moves (nip-up, elbow drop, inverted atomic drop, etc. Sweet Chin Music always irritates me. Whenever he throws SCM I want someone to capture suplex him), they actually fit into this match quite well. HBK busted Jeff Hardy open after a very hard clothesline (HBK, maybe you should be the one to teach Maria). Soon after Jeff was seen bleeding from the nose and lip piercing. We also saw HBK put various submissions on Jeff, who would then escape. The match ended with a Swanton (of course), giving Jeff Hardy the win. I hope they let Jeff main event Wrestlemania, instead of building him up like they did before the loss at Royal Rumble. It's time for a different kind of champion.

Final side note:
Week #2 with no sign of Triple H. Well, at least they didn't replace him with the fugliest of fuglies, Gene Snitsky, like they did last week.